Monday, January 28, 2008

Dear DJ

Pretty soon you'll be getting married, and I realise that the day that happens all ties between us will finally be severed. Well, I suppose not all ties. We'll still be friends, but the special bond we shared will be history forever.

The point of no return with regards to the end of our relationship was passed the day I had to find out from my best friend that you were engaged. Engaged????? I was completely freaked out by it. I wasn't even aware that you guys were back together....we were out just a couple of nights before.....we had unfinished business....we had unfinished affairs and we had an unfinished story.

I guess we'll never have the time to complete that story now. So I'll write the letter to replace the happy ending which should have been.

I think I've mentioned before that I have not been in love very many times in my life. You my dear, were one of the few. I will never ever forget the night we met and the absolute confusion in my mind as to why for the first time in my life I was at a loss for words(this does not happen very often) and my state of complete witlessness was disturbing to say the least.

Your devotion and love caught me completely off guard and for the first time in a very long time I was completely and utterly whipped. I even tuned to your station to listen to you do the breakfast show. A really really big thing, since i professed my hate of your employer the day I met you, and I vowed to never listen to it...not even for you.

You made me laugh, love, cry, hope, happy and sad all at the same time. You scared me, but also made me feel safe and cherished. You shared my love of music, poetry and writing, and you promised me a story.....our story.

My parents were elated when they found out who the mysterious young stranger of my dreams were, and you were accepted into the family in an instant. Friends were amazed at how dependant i became of your presence and your approval....me, the little miss know it all who can do anything on her own.

My future looked rosy and the life we were planning seemed perfect. But the stress and the toll of our busy lives eventually removed the rosy sunglasses of love from our eyes and we started seeing each other for who we really were. Even so we were perfect together and we braved the unbreachable gaps between our schedules and our lifestyles.

Spending time together became difficult and rare as you were working during early morning and were off during most of the day and couldn't stay out too late, while i worked during the day and could only party at night. We finally decided that for the time being we had to call it quits....in the romance department anyway. Quality time had become almost impossible as we both climbed the ladder of success in our careers. We were lovers no longer, but friends with a special bond....who sometime forgot that they were supposed to be only friends.

Then suddenly my little world was shattered. You were engaged and our story was over, before it could even make a proper start. I think the thing that hit me hardest was the fact that your fiance was your ex-girlfriend. The bloody nympho! The one who cheated on you repeatedly in the most awful way.

You say she has changed...but i know better. I see the way she looks at every single male in the room, I see the way she seeks a way to sneak away whenever your head is turned.....i see her treacherous nature, and there is nothing i can do.

For your sake, i sincerely hope that she has changed. For the first time in my life, I pray that I will be proven wrong. You're a decent guy, and you deserve the best. My wish for you is happiness and love. And should she not have changed, for your sake i pray that you will remain blind to this fact and that you will be happy.

A little piece of my heart will always belong to you. But this is the end of our story. Not a love story as was planned but a story of friendship, of love, of life, of tragedy and of bittersweet goodbyes.

I will forever cherish the moments we shared, and the memories we built. You showed me so many different sides of myself, and taught me just how strong and how weak I can be. You built me up after another had completely ripped me to shreds and for this i will forever be indebted to you. I hope that we shall remain friends forever on this journey. And though it may be the end of one story, I pray that it will be the beginning of another.

Love

Your Ruby

15 comments:

Patchwork said...

Fanks for sharing this hun. It's a letter I should have written myself, but I am a crap letter-writer. Your generosity of spirit is truly inspiring Rhu.

Sweets said...

you are just too nice sugar! oh well, such is life eh? (i am so helpful sometimes aren't i?)

Amy xxoo said...

Angain with the heart wrenching stuff Ruby.... but what i actually like about this letter is the hope you hold for this guy, that everything will work out for him, for the best, even if it doesnt involve you.

Thats selfless, and i admire that trait very much...

Elise said...

Oh Ruby! I got a little emotional reading the letter. It must have been quite a blow.

It shounds like he's made a mistake though... the girl sounds loose! You're an extremely warm person for hoping that he doesn't hurt her.

I hope he realises how lucky he is to still have a piece of your warm heart.

xx

Ruby said...

bridge - well go on hun...even if you suck at it you'll see that it is an amazing experience....it frees your soul! Ta on the generosity comment:)

SweetAss - the question is...is there really such thing as being too nice? shouldn't we all wish the people around as the best?

Amy - *blushing* thanx sweety. I jsut sat there typing away after chatting to him over the phone last night. I only really found out what i wrote afterwards. And to be very honest....that is the way i really really feel. The only thing i ever wanted for him was happiness...because i love him. I probably always will...wel, sorta anyway:-)

elise - emotions are good hun...as long as we don't get too emotional too often!I suppose you mean that she doesn't hurt him? he wouldn't hurt a fly if he could help it:-)
thanx hun......all of you deserve a whole big bunch of hugs!

So here goes...*hugs*

KaB said...

Bugger...is that how that story ends?!?

I'm in the middle of the book, so to speak! We've been there, done that, best friends at the moment! I'm petrified to know how I will feel when another girl enters the piccie!

Hopefully we will also stay close friends forever & ever & have more stories to tell :)

Glad you're okay about it though :) bar the nympho back in the picture!

The Blonde Blogshell said...

You should have a warning attached to your blogs:

WARNING: Keep tissues close by. This is a tear jerker.

I am so sorry.

Ruby said...

KaB - actually it's a gorgeous story....the ending is just unexpected and not the way you'd imagine it while you're writing/reading the story.

Blondie - Awe! sorry hun! i keep forgetting! I'll try and remember next time...but when i start writing the whole world kinda disappears for a bit and i don't think of things like warnings and such. Here's a complimentary tissue! I'm OK tho. It's just now that push is coming to shove and i actually have to deal with the finallity of it and all....its getting to me just a little. But it's allright. He's happy and i will be happy...so thats' all that matter right?

High in Dubai said...

Ah bless!

Nosjunkie said...

Its sad when that happens hunny but stuff turnes out for the best in the end

ExMi said...

sometimes men are just so stupid...throwing away something good....

SonnyVsDan said...

I don't think I'm necessarily with everyone else in the group, but I loved the letter all the same. I say that, because part of your desperately seems to still want him (and you should, a relationship can't really have ever been a relationship unless part of you wishes you could still have them) - which means that part of you might be happy if she turns out to be the evil wench you know she is. But that's not my point.

I loved this letter because of the lines weaved through your words. The lines clearly defining your love for him and your distaste for her. Two sides of the coin that are your letters..

Ruby said...

High - Ta!

Nos - i'm with you on that one:-) things will turn out for the best...i have faith in that;-)

Ruby said...

SvD - I love your way of thinking sir:) And yes, you hit the nail on the head. Even though i really want him to be happy, even if it's not with me, i still have a very strong inner conflict. The one part of me really wishes that i was the one he was getting engaged to....and i think that's a pretty normal reaction. As you say...thats the only way of it ever being a real relationship.

But the overwhelming part of me is def just wishing for his happiness. I'd rather have him happily married to a bitch than unhappily married to some really awesome girl (i.e ME) he he:-)

Life is a strange thing, and being me i've learned to have faith a looong time ago.

AngelConradie said...

well, i am not "friends" at all with any of my exes- to me its goodbye forever coz there's just too much history so i cannot imagine being where you are.
i can't believe he didn't tell you though!