Dear Odi

As I'm sitting here writing this I'm trying my very best to bite back the tears.  I am at work, I'm attempting to keep looking professional even though my heart is in a very sad place.  I just received your phone call. You are remarkably calm for somebody who has just been diagnosed with a brain tumor....a rather large one at that.  Then again....I would have been surprised if you weren't in complete control, a pillar of strength among your own sadness, the way you have always been.

I met you when i was only 17 years old, and over the years you have become a role model, a mentor, a life coach, a friend and for a brief moment in time you were also once the possible future father in law. You were there with advice and and a willing ear and shoulder when sadness struck and when i had to make big decision. Coaching me through life's little hurdles to become the person i was meant to be without either of us realising it.  In my mind you were invincible...nothing could ever get you down.  And here you are today, only human...your mortality cruelly flung into all our faces.

We are not without hope for a recovery.  You are waiting to hear when they will schedule your operation to take the tumor out.  Such a delicate and incredibly dangerous operation...my chest is already contracting in fear.  And then there will be months of chemo.  And with my family having a history of cancer I know what chemo does to a person.

I will hold you and your family in my prayers. Pleading with God to keep you safe during the operation and to make pain and suffering the minimum.  And at the same time I will express gratitude at the fact that i have you in my life at all.  And even though my heart is breaking right now I won't lose hope...because you won't let us.

I believe that one day soon we will all be walking on the beach again after this ordeal, laughing and singing: 'Al die goue see sand al die goue see sand by jou', and the thought of this brings a teary smile to my face.  Get better soon... *hugs*

Love
Ruby
xxxxxx